mess -- poem

take some
give some
return, rebound
craving emotion
then loathing the swoon
on bended kneep
leading
genuflecting
stand next
worship
recoil
arms to the sky
scream
demand an answer
feeling the weight
as Atlas
holding the sphere
bend again
backwards
break
forever moving
buckling
feeling the iron
prepare
yearning for numbness
after that rush
adrenaline
after the feeling
die a little
try to live
still quivering
chaotic logic
peaceful insanity
brewing the mind
fading
fading
rushing forward
fade once more
what am i talking about
i wasn't even aware
of my heart
beating still