Altered Replay--poem

After a while it fades to grey-
like raining ash after
the explosion-
How cliché does that sound,
but who really gives a Damn?

If I told you I loved you,
I’d be lying.
Oh, I’m sorry:
did that hurt?
(But the truest lie is that
I never cared.)

Even if I’ve fooled Myself by saying
you’ll call tomorrow or that
you’ll smile
every time you see my face.
You still don’t have the right to
smother my Love all over the pavement
with each instance that
you had to be drunk
to hand me any
semblance of affection.

Spinelessness has run its course
and tired its useSo toughen up, or walk out-
(like you do so well
every day, every time, in every way).

You’re still the same.

You’ve become the Ghost, haunting
my what if’s,
trickling through my every pleasure and
torment-

Teach me how to transform to
mist-
for you will never
transubstantiate
my fantasies of you and I
into delicious reality.

Teach me how to disappear like
you’ve mastered-
time and day and month, year-
enough of the rambling.

Teach me how to
sever all emotion or
replay your forte and
just leave.