The Lesson-poem

For you, Daddy

You must know
that looking at you
is like staring into
any given mirror.
The love inside
and behind these eyes
is right there,
reflected into your very own.

You must know
the mem’ry of your kind face
hasn’t died-
I see it still Upon my own-
more so when I’ve something to be
proud of.

You must know
though I didn’t cry on the day,
which I regard as the time of night
when monsters roam,
and I’m blind though I try
to fumble around
for some semblance of
Life, Vitality, and Hope,
I suffocate for what feels like forever,
trapped in abysmal agony,
only to wake up to
reality
as if someone threw me
in frigid waters-

I’ve absorbed it all,
every drop I could,
then I let them pour through
though I couldn’t help it.
I’ve been your waterfall
whether you like it
(or not)
but you must know,
You must know.

You must know
that the childhood dream
of dressing in Love-
enrobed in White,
has turned to ash-
for it won’t be your hand
guiding mine down the path
to Tomorrow.

You must know
your name nigh became
taboo,
a ghost
we’re all too scared to acknowledge,
for the pain will rush back,
my hair will stand up,
the Chill will return,
then I’ll fumble again.

You must know
that despite all this nonsense,
despite all these words
that are feeble compared
to the legacy you bestowed me,
flowing through these grateful
Veins,
I’ll never know
how to express
how much I love you-
I’ll never know
how long
the World will last,
how long
time will drone on,
then cruelly whip past-

You must know
that’s how long I’ll hold you in
my heart.

You must know,
and if you don’t,
here it is,
here it lives.